Email Marketing: I Hope They Have Soya Sauce

A few months ago I asked wife #1 a question.

Now this was no ordinary question. In fact it was a
question most people would ask only once in a lifetime.

You see it had been bugging me for awhile. It was an answer
I had to know…to give me some peace and serenity within.

The issue had been pulling me apart, like a chain saw ripping through
thick timber logs of pine. It’s something which needed to be
resolved because it was festering and stopping me from
concentrating at times.

To be honest, this perplexing situation was all my fault.

It had become monster-sized but…

I knew if I didn’t seek the answer my ability to concentrate
over long periods would remain unbelievably devastating.

I couldn’t wait any longer It had to be finalised. No matter
if the answer was going to be jaw-dopping and one I didn’t
wish to hear.

I remember the night well.

It was a warmish night, we were sitting outside sharing a
bottle of Semillon/Sauvignon Blanc. Sons #1, #2, #3, & #4
were not to be seen. (Not cool to be sitting outside by the
pool with the parents.)

My wife had her normal supply of grocery brochures, collected
over a six-day period. The brochures layed patiently on the outdoor
table waiting for their turn to be grabbed, flicked, scribbled
upon and discarded. (remind me not come back as a grocery brochure
in my next life !)

There were also a copious supply of tr.avel brochures.
It seems wife #1 was intent to find the perfect over-seas holi.day for
the family. One in which we could frolick, enjoy and laugh together.

She still remembers our family trip to Bali two years
ago and wishes to relive the dream. The research was becoming increasingly
absorbing. Her waking hours were consumed with idylic thoughts of
another over-seas trip – with all six of us.

But I didn’t share this view.

For a good reason.

You see I had planned on going over-seas with my wife for
our 25th wedding anniversary. By ourselves. No kids, no friends and
certainly no WORK.

Yet, every time I mentioned, “What are we going to do for our
25th wedding anniversay?” I received the reply, “I’m looking
for a holi.day so we can all go together.” “Won’t that be fun.”

Now I do love my kids (sometimes…) but the answer had to be
“NO !”

Ok, I was a bit gutless here. I didn’t really say “NO !”, I answered
“Hmmm…”

I have to admit though taking my kids on my 25th wedding anniversary
wasn’t really something I wanted to do.

And I believe… I really do… It wasn’t what I would expect my wife would
actually want either.

So it dawned on me…

I had to take back control. I had to get an answer. So I did what most
men would do.

I devised a plan. A plan that was so meticulously thought out that I had to win.

As Sun Tzu quotes in “The Art of War”
“Supreme excellence consists in breaking the enemy’s resistance without fighting.”
Sun-Tzu (~400 BC)

My plan was devious – even by my standards.

I had to think of a place over-seas where my wife would like to go but
NOT be interested in taking her precious young men.

I would then corner her in a postion to make a choice.
“Where do you wish to go for our anniversary, Dear – here or here?”

The plan went down like a Hollywood production.

I methodically placed before her, two large envelopes. Concealed inside
were brochures where we could dine on our 25th Anniversary.

I asked her to open the envelope on the left first. (You must make it
play out with stunning effect).

The anticipation in wife #1’s eyes were enchanting.   But I knew there
was no way I could lose. Sun Tzu would have been so proud of me.

Slowly but dramatically before my wife’s curious eyes the first brochure was
revealed. Gingerly, yet assuredly she pulled out the brochure with the
tips of her fingers. It was like extracting a fine splinter lodged in one of
our sons toes many years ago.

The brochure she first saw was:

House Of Chow Chinese Menu

 

I had her attention – not in the way she thought I would but as I said,
“Sun Tsu would have been proud of me.”

I then remarked – “I think having a Chinese Banquet at the
House of Chow, in Hutt Street, would be a good way to celebrate our
25th wedding anniversary.” “Don’t you?”

We could order Number 2, 4, 7, 15, 45, 57, and a nice bottle of wine.

I could see her quizzical mind turning summersaults. “Uhm, yeah.” She said.

And then I added another layer of intrigue.

“Or we could dine here.” I chirped.

I then pointed to the remaining unopened envelope now appearing more
mysterious then a few seconds ago.

This time there was no nervous delay. Just a quick grab, a rip at the
envelope flap and this was revealed.


Needless to say…

Sons #1, #2, #3 and #4 will now be on their own for ten days soon.

And…

So will we.

But there is something gnawing inside me and that is:

I hope they have Soya Sauce in Paris.
Believe In Yourself

Kurt

 

PS: If you have read this far. I’d like to say thank you and make you
an offer. This email is #1 in my “There are only 8 different types of emails.”

If you are looking for help in writing and contacting your customers then
this may appeal, so contact me and ask me to overview an email you wish to send out.

About Kurt

I'm passionate about helping people in small to medium businesses get BIG results from email marketing. Email Marketing is about 1. Your List 2. Your Relationship With Your List and 3. Your Offer. When you get the three in unison, watch your profits soar. If you're not sure what I mean. Contact me. I can and will help. Believe In Yourself - Kurt

Comments

  1. I might sneak it in my luggage Christopher. Kurt

  2. christopher says:

    Good story, Byo on the soya sauce.

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