How Not To Engage With People

I need to let you know about a weird and dumb experience I had recently with a Facebook ‘friend’.

The word friend is interesting in itself because Facebook people are acquaintances but are they really friends?

Like I mean…

Don’t you invite friends over to your place for a BBQ and a glass of red ?

Anyway back to the point I wish to make with this story.

I was contacted by someone as a Private Message in my Facebook inbox which loosely said…

“Hey Kurt, we have a number of mutual friends, why don’t we connect?”

My natural response was…

“Yeah, Ok. “Why not.”

And so this ‘friendship’ began.

Two weeks later I received another Private Message in my Facebook inbox from the same person who asked…

“Hi Kurt, it is great we are friends, what do you do ?”

I thought to myself…

“What the heck?”

I thought we were Friends ???

Haven’t you at least looked at my profile or ‘Googled’ me before you asked this question ?

My response was…


And I mean nothing.

It was not worth the effort to reply.



Maybe I am a grumpy ol’ man or maybe…

I just don’t see the point conversing with someone who hasn’t done their homework.

But if you make the effort to first contact someone then take the effort to learn something about them too.

And I don’t mean by asking.

That is the lazy way.

Do some research first.

Now the moral of this story is not embedded in Facebook, it is…


Your Customers.

Learn a little bit about them before you go plugging them with messages and advertising.

Here’s a template you can steal which will help you.

Get to know your customers and prospects inside out so you can motivate them to take action now.

You really need to be able to get inside their head.

Here are ten questions which will help you dive inside their minds to dig deep and understand them more.

  1. What causes them to to find difficulty sleeping at night because their problem is real to them ?
  2. What are they scared of ?
  3. What are they angry about and Who are they angry at ?
  4. What frustrates them during the day ?  Try to name a few things.
  5. What is trending in their business ?  Think about Economical, Social, Political, Environmental, and Technology trends.
  6. What do they secretly, desire to have or happen in their business or life ?
  7. Are they geared to receive advertising messages a certain way ?  Email, Direct Mail, Letter, Social Media ?
  8. Do they possess their own lingo/jargon ? What words or phrases could you use. ?
  9. Who else do they buy from ?  Why do they buy from them ?
  10. Where do they hang out ? i.e What do they read and what websites do they look at?

Segment your customers into lists and then send them meaningful messages.

If you are not sure how to go about this then contact me.

Or better still get a hold of these easy to read Kindle Books.

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7 Killer Tips to Email Success
How To Beat The Spam Filters Legitimately And Get Your Emails Delivered
The 8 Different Email Types – Revealed

Believe In Yourself

About Kurt

I'm passionate about helping people in small to medium businesses get BIG results from email marketing. Email Marketing is about 1. Your List 2. Your Relationship With Your List and 3. Your Offer. When you get the three in unison, watch your profits soar. If you're not sure what I mean. Contact me. I can and will help. Believe In Yourself - Kurt

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